How to Transform Your Resistance To Change
I recently listened to a podcast featuring Chris Lee who wrote the book, The 10 Principles of Abundance and Prosperity.
He explained how resistance stops us from having meaningful relationships, rewarding work and the body we’ve always wanted.
What Is Resistance?
Resistance is avoiding something, not trusting something, not embracing something…
When you resist a relationship you are pushing it away.
When you resist a feeling you are covering it up.
When you resist change, a decision you need to make, you are running away.
Resistance is a strategy we use to avoid doing something hard or difficult like losing weight, asking someone out, pursuing meaningful work…
It is our way of keeping ourself safe.
The problem is that what you resist persists!
What Are The Reasons We Resist?
We think there are rewards or payoffs when we resist doing things we know we should:
We stay safe and seemingly in control.
We think we will not get hurt.
We don’t want to rock the boat or jeopardize what we already have.
When You Resist You Pay The Price
But when you resistant something that is to your benefit like a relationship, a business opportunity – you pay a price by pushing it away.
By confronting what you are resisting, going-all-in and embracing it – it allows you to transform your fear and finally conquer it.
Resistance To Change Can Be Overcome
Here are the steps to start overcoming resistance:
Step 1: What is the payoff?
Tell the truth…I am in resistance to X or I am avoiding Y…acknowledge it.
For instance if you are resisting taking care of your health, the payoff is I can eat what I want and I can sleep when I want.
That gives you the false sense you are comfortable.
The price is you are overweight, uncomfortable in your body and you lack energy and motivation.
Step 2: What is the source of the resistance?
The source is always some limiting belief.
A belief that is fueled by fear and a belief that maintains the resistance…
It’s too hard…
I can’t do it…
I will miss out…
I will have to sacrifice…
I will be unhappy..
It can’t be done…
Step 3: What are the consequences of the resistance?
If you keep resisting getting out of your comfort zone, you need to ask yourself:
How will it play out?
What are the long term consequence and the price of resisting?
Step 4: Surrender
Accept and own you are afraid.
Let go of judging yourself, because when you are judging yourself that causes more resistance.
For instance, when you judge your body – you fight it.
If, instead, you love and embrace your body, you can use your energy in a positive, proactive way to change it.
In resisting something, you create negative energy, tension and disease.
By instead embracing and surrendering, you can redirecting your energy and get clear on the next steps.
Then you will have two choices:
1. Surrender and own the fact there is nothing I can do about it and let it go.
2. Create a vision and action plan to change it
Step 5: What is your vision?
What you focus on expands.
If you resist something, it just gets bigger.
Resistance creates walls – your wall is just your fear based on some belief like I am not good enough.
Know you have this wall and be willing to love it, surrender and embrace and than create positive energy to create your vision.
Once you create a vision and declare it…
Declare here is where I am and this is where I am headed.
Step 6: Trust the process
Next you need to transform your fear into faith.
Fear is the expectation that everything will turn out in a negative way and faith is knowing it will turn out in a beautiful way.
Trust you can transform it into something wonderful.
Disprove Your Limiting Beliefs
Life is a journey and it is meant to be lived with passion, joy and excitement.
So you have to step out of your comfort zone….
Break through your resistance…
Disprove your limiting beliefs by doing things you would not do…
Go out and do karaoke.
Write a letter of appreciation to your mother or spouse.
Ask someone out that is out of your league.
If you say that this is not me, you are putting yourself in a box.
By challenging yourself and stepping through resistance that will transform your life.
What Are You Resisting?
Is there something in your life you really want, but some resistance is holding you back?
Click on the graphic below and let’s figure out how you can break though it!